Ben Affleck is a pussy. He goes to hospital because he has a headache. What a pussy. You know what I do when I have a headache? I take a half dozen ibuprofen and suck it up. But Ben Affleck, being such a giant pussy, has to go to the emergency room. So instead of treating victims of the random drunken violence that I assume rages on non-stop in Cambridge, Mass., the emergency room doctors had to waste their valuable time and skills giving Affleck some Advil and a cold washcloth to put on his forehead. I’m not sure if anyone died yesterday in the vicinity of Cambridge, but if someone did, it’s Affleck’s fault. Their blood is on his hands.
I suppose one good thing came out of this: it got me to stop thinking about Dutch pedophiles’ attempt to form a political party. They want the eliminate that whole pesky age of consent rule. They say such laws only make children curious. But isn’t that what a pedophile should want? If changing the laws eliminates the sexual curiosity of young children, how will the pedophiles take advantage of them? It’s a Catch-22: they want to eliminate the age of consent to provide legal access to underage children, but eliminating those laws would make the children decidedly less horny and sexually curious, thus depriving the pedophiles access to the horny pre-pubescent children they so greatly desire. I never realized pedophilia was filled with such conundrums. I suppose their efforts will fail and they’ll have to go back to pretending to be equal rights activists and dreaming about having sex with an 11-year-old Ben Affleck. No, I take that back, not even a pedophile would want to have sex with a pussy like Affleck.
That’s quite a rhetorical trick you used there to conflate Ben Affleck and organized pedophila. Kudos.
In other news you can all gaze at my snuggly new kitten,Mabel
When will you and the wife grow a pair and name one of your damn cats Mr. Marbles? Even just Marbles would suffice. And that’s a terrible picture of Mabel. It could just as well be a black kitten-shaped scarf. Do you honestly think that picture will win kitten battles against anything other than the ugliest of kittens? Have you seen the other kittens? They’re adorable! And, most importantly, I can clearly tell that they are not kitten-shaped scarves. I expect you to post reply to this comment and I will be judging your inherent coolness by the quality of your subject line. There is only one correct answer, so choose wisely.
You can get it on with a 16 or 17 year old in the Netherlands?
You can do pretty much anything there. I’d be shocked if there weren’t lower ages of consent elsewhere around the globe.
Mabel is currently 9-7-2 on kittenwar.com She may not have the natural beauty of other kittens who are younger and more pigmentally diverse, but she has spirit. We did name a cat Mr. Marbles, he was a stray who lived around our backyard in Philly. Mr. Marbles was orange, liked to sit in the sun, and under most conditions disliked being approached.
Age of consent info here
You disappoint me. I’m not saying your kitten isn’t cute, but that picture is not kittenwar material. You need a close-up shot. I suggest putting her in a baseball cap or sack of flour. Everybody loves a kitten sitting inside something.
Interesting fact for those of you who don’t click links: In Burkina Faso, the age of consent for hetero sex is 13, but for two sexy ladies to legally get it on, they have to be 21.